The trip back home for Juan Pablo started off by seeing his daughter and the rest of his family. Poor Camilla ran right into her fathers arms and placed a kiss on his lips. Honey, after you see what has happened so far in your fathers journey to find love, you will not want to kiss him for a very very long time. Or ever. After spending some time with his daughter el bachelor hung out with his cousin and told him about a few of the ladies. It was here where he told him that a woman named Sharleen could be, "The one." If you haven't rolled you eyes yet, don't worry, they will be rolling soon.
Back at the ladies new digs, they are all hoping that they all get one-on-one dates this week. The answer came sooner rather then later when Juan Pabs visited the ladies and delivered the date card himself. He excitedly gave it to Sharleen who just sat there and showed no emotion. Leave it to Chelsie to speak for the rest of the house and the audience who has been watching the past few weeks to say, "I just can't seem to figure out why they are in a relationship." Thank you Chelsie.
Sharleen and Juan Pablo continued the most awkward relationship ever broadcasted on television when they took their date to a yacht. It was here where they just made out the entire time while audio from Sharleen's interviews played in the background. It was here that she talked about how she sees herself with the bachelor, but at the same time she doesn't. She didnt feel ready to introduce him to her parents. As she continued to go back and forth with her feelings, Juan Pabs continued to talk about how wonderful Sharleen is.
After their time on the yacht, they had dinner and Sharleen expressed to him how she wish she "was dumber." Yes Sharleen we are all aware that you are way to smart to be a part of this dog and pony show but don't make the poor guy feel bad. You know so many more words then he does. After their extremely anti climatic date, Sharleen returns home to talk to House Mom Renee. Seriously they need to put Renee on The Bachelor pay roll because she has been doing more counseling then Chris Harrison this season. Sharleen expresses her doubts to the house mom, and like every good house mom should, Renee told her to really think about it because down the line she might regret her decision. Even though Renee was talking her off the edge, her and Sharleen both knew that the opera singer was more then on her way out the door.
The second one-on-one date this week went to Nikki The Nurse. Now after a few rough weeks of not playing very nice with the other girls, for example shit talking about people on group dates, her has been able to form a strong connection to Juan Pablo. It is so strong in fact that for her one-on-one date Juan Pabs brought Nikki to Camilla's dance recital to meet his daughter, his family and his baby momma...HOLD UP!
Apparently in Venezuela it is not uncommon to have the person you are dating meet your family right away. I mean from an American stand point, we do not introduce the person we are dating to our family unless there is a pregnancy scare or a death in the family. No one is gung-ho to introduce someone to the family, so in America unless those two scenarios happen the person we are dating continues to be a mystery to the family. This, however, is the world of The Bachelor. Juan Pabs is still three weeks out from introducing his final two women to the family let alone his daughter! I don't know how the Venezuelans do it, but Americans put everything off to the last possible second. Nothing like messing with your kids head and introducing her to all the different women you are dating Juan Pabs.
Nikki and Juan Pabs start at a flower store where they pick up the most wilted bouquet of flowers that the naked eye has ever seen. After that, they head over to Camillas dance recital where there are 20 children in black leotards, dance moms excited to be on a show that airs on prime time, Juan Pabs parents and his baby momma. Oh yes, this was in fact a family affair and a parted one if that. Juan Pabs parents sat in between Juan Pabs and his new woman and Juan Pablo's other woman. If anyone gets credit it would be Nikki The Nurse. If the guy I was dating threw me into the lions den of meeting his child's baby momma not even two months into the relationship I would have said something. But, in typical Nikki The Nurse optimism everything was perfect.
Camilla danced, the flowers that were meant for Camilla went to the baby momma, Nikki kissed Camilla and then told her that she tasted like Cheetos, and then the baby momma continued to throw some serious shade towards Nikki. Of course if you ask Juan Pablo he would have told you everything was perfect. Everything was awkward and everything hurt, well, for the audience at least.
After the dance recital Juan Pabs took Nikki to his "office". Nikki officially dubbed their date Juan Pabs hometown date because she was the one who was really stepping into his everyday life. His office just happened to be the baseball field where the Florida Marlins play. The two drove onto the filed, threw the ball around, and it was here where we are all grateful for boob tape. Seriously, we all know Nikki The Nurse likes to whore it up on group dates, but even on her one-on-ones she manages to find a way to make a statement. She wore and mini skirt and a white top that went straight down her chest. It looked like she was ready for a 70s disco. All of this aside, Nikki did ask some pressing questions like how is she supposed to fit into this family that Juan Pabs already has. He explained to her how he is still friends with Camilla's mom and Nikki asks if she is okay with this whole situation. Juan Pabs said of course she is, but come on. We all know the baby momma was not please about how that all went down. The two end the date in the ball park with a kiss and it is only a matter of time until the rest of Delta Bach find out that Nikki met the other girl in Juan Pabs life.
Back at the new sorority digs, the sisters of Delta Bach continue to pow wow in the living room. It is then that Sharleen comes in all fancy and tells the women that she is leaving. No one is really sad or surprised, and Sharleen quickly moves down the hall to break the news to el bachelor. The entire break up was odd because they were whispering the whole time. Sharleen also used the phrase how this whole thing is, "Excruciatingly hard." I don't know about you guys, but I was waiting for Juan Pabs to nod his head slowly and then ask, "What does that means?" Juan Pablo told her that everything was okay and that he was really sad to see her go. It was a clean and not dramatic break up, which is expected from a stone cold emotionless person like Sharleen. No real drama but Juan Pabs did shed a few tears. He had to shed a few tears, the woman who he thought could be the one just left. Us on the other hand were cheering. Buh bye!
The next day was the group date and this week it was Clare, Renee, Chelsie and Andi who were the chosen ones. They hopped on a plane that took them to their own private island and Juan Pabs spent alone time with each of them. This date had a lot riding on it though. This was the only date this week that had a rose on it, and whoever got that rose was going to continue on the date with him while the others board the plane back home.
Chelsie was the first one out of the gate on the group date and it was here that she really tried to pimp herself out for a hometown date. She brought out different letters that her family and friends wrote her and her and Juan Pabs had a good laugh. That was it because lets face it, Chelsie is not a serious one. Andi was next and their one-on-one time was spent with Andi on a beach wearing what looked like Joseph's Technicolor Dream Coat and crying about how uncertain she is about the current situation. Come on Andi, we all know you are way to smart and pretty to be on this show let alone act like this. Juan Pabs calms her down within seconds and then the two have another make out session on the beach. I have come to find that Juan Pablo really does not know what to say to these ladies, he just smothers them with kisses in hopes they stop talking English to him. Side Note: Juan Pabs was wearing water shoes the entire time. Thats equivalent to wearing crocs and we all have a problem with that.
The last person on this date was Crazy Clare. Clare really needed to dig deep into her well of sad stories if she wanted to get a hometown date, and of course she was able to come up with a little something. I'm surprised it took her this long to drop the whole dead dad DVD story. Remember that from the first week? Her dad made a DVD for Clare's future husband and no one has seen it, not even Clare. She is waiting for that special someone to see it and she hopes it Juan Pabs. The two kiss and Clare is certain that she is getting that rose.
SURPRISE CLARE! YOU ARE OUT AGAIN!! Andi got the rose and the two continued their date while the other three headed back to the house. Andi and Juan Pabs continued their date on the streets of Miami where Juan Pabs took her to a club and they danced to latin music. Andi can't dance, but none of that matters.
Back at the house the three ladies, who technically got kicked off the group date, came home and called upon Nikki who is keeping to herself upstairs in her room. Nikki comes down and Chelsie explains to her how the date worked and why they are there. Nikki found it funny that the mood in the room was shifted. Chelsie was laughing, Renee was just smiling and Clare looked "checked out." "Oh Im not checked out," said Clare. "Im just not going to sit here and be fake." Nikki did not press on that again and let it got but then Clare brings out more crazy and says, "Maybe Andi got the rose because she needs that reassurance." Basically saying how she is not confident blah blah blah. Nikki, annoyed at Clares comment, removes herself from the room and goes upstairs. Clare, wanting to continue to fight, follows her upstairs.
Are you guys all ready to loose some brain cells? As Clare moves upstairs, she then begins to pick a fight over nothing with Nikki. Nikki explained how she did not want to sit in a room of people who were talking shit about her friend. According to Clare no one was talking shit, but we all know Clare wanted to. Long story short Nikki had enough and told Clare that she does not like her, how they are never going to be friends, and that she can excuse herself from her room. Clare's big comeback, "Oh I can excuse myself?" Nikki then asks her, "Yes, do you sleep here?" Clare then says, "Did you pay for this room?" Nikki then says, "No did you?" like it was the dumbest question in the world. Clare said, "Exactly neither of us paid for this room. It's a common space." It was like watching six grade girls fight over a seat in the lunch room. Nikki got the last word in calling Clare, "bat shit crazy" and then followed up with, "Clare is like a dog. She peed on him first. The problem is she claimed territory that might not be hers." Bingo Nikki The Nurse.
What did we all learn from this fight? Well we learned that Clare was totally not talking shit, that neither of the girls pays for the hotel rooms they stay in, that Clare hates to be interrupted, that the place they stay in is in fact a common space, Clare is absolutely bat shit crazy and Nikki totally won that thing that was considered a fight. Everyone can go about their everyday lives now because we know this kind of information.
The cattiness spilled over to the cocktail party where Nikki and Clare find themselves sitting in silence, by themselves, for a good while. Nikki sat like a statue, while Clare looked off into the distance hoping that Nikki would make some sort of statement towards her. "I just don't think Nikki is mature enough for this type of relationship," Clare said spitefully. "I understand if its slim pickens but its not." I'm sorry Clare, did you get to meet Camilla? Juan Pabs knows you are too crazy for a situation like that. Clare would have probably tried to fight the baby momma because she would have given her a dirty look. Side note: During her one-on-one time with Juan Pabs at the cocktail party, Crazy Clare mentioned that she is the last of her five sisters to get married. Gee, I wonder why that is!
Chelsie was the one who was sent home which was no surprise. Juan Pabs really liked her and she really liked him and it was sad to see her go. She was another one who spoke highly of Juan Pablo and bowed out gracefully. Next week is a two night bachelor event full of drama, disapproving parents, tears, fantasy date nights go wrong, and more tears!
Also for a bonus video this week, members of The Roots on The Tonight Show With Jimmy Fallon recreate the fight scene between Clare and Nikki. The bit starts at 40 second in. Quest Love as Clare and Turiq as Nikki fight better then the actual Clare and Nikki.